Typical Alaskan Summer Day

Since March 2014 I have been chasing down my husband lol. But seriously, I up and quit my good job, switched all my college classes online and moved to Missouri, to move into a place and have my CrossFit coaching boyfriend move in with me. I worked two different jobs while in Missouri, put Anthony is a new school and waited it out while Nick decided what he wanted to do with his life. A little more than a year after moving to MO Nick joined the active duty Army. I had already left a lot of my stuff in North Carolina when I made the move to MO, so before leaving MO I sold pretty much everything we had. Everything that didn’t fit inside my car (I towed my car on a dolly) and whatever fit in the back of Nick’s truck. I dropped Nick off at his recruiters office and Anthony, the dogs, and my pregnant self (with baby Rowan) made the journey back to NC. It was a non-stop trip because our stuff was exposed in the bed of the truck. So other than a quick nap in a Walmart parking lot somewhere in Tennessee, we drove straight through. I honestly could not ask for a better son. He has been through way way more than most adults. (single military mom, me leaving him for deployments, moved more than 10 times in his 9 years of life, a violent and neglectful biological father, me and his stepfather getting divorced, people in his life dying, and me getting married again) most adults need therapy after one of those life events. Yet my son, so resilient, so brave, and so understanding. I pray for his heart, that he remains such a sweet soul as he is today. I think forever, he and I will have a unique and special bond. I just don’t get as many pictures of him because now he has an abundance of friends and plays outside from sun up to sun down, (we only get about 4 hours of sundown here in Alaska right now 😉 With that being said, people now ask me, “how did you just up and move to Alaska” its simple, I love my husband and I love that has ambition to change his situation an join an organization bigger than himself. And people spend thousands of dollars to vacation in AK, why wouldn’t I live here!

Today, we started the day watching “Wild Hearts Can’t Be Broken” one of my all time favorite. It was interrupted when my renters called saying the AC at our rental property was not working AGAIN. ughhh sucks, twice in a month there has been issues. But the East Coast is getting hammered with a heat index. I am glad it was a simple fix, for their sake. So then I gathered up the children and headed to the commissary. We had hot dogs at the hot dog stand and watch the Blue Angels practicing for the air show this weekend. After our grocery run and our run home to unload them (we unpacked only the cold stuff) we decided to visit some of the home town shops. I have an obsession with used book stores. So of course my kids will too 😉 We went to used book stores, thrift stores, antique shops! Anthony asks so many questions about “what this does, or what is this used for?” He even found an “antique” phone! lol I am not talking an actual antique (even though there were some of those as well) I am talking a phone from the 90’s haha you know the one that plugs into the wall and has a cord. His sister and him sat in amazement. I am happy to tell him all about those treasures of the past. Anthony does not have a cell phone (I lie, he has an old phone of mine that is used only IF I run out and he is home alone so he can facetime me) But he doesn’t have his own personal phone he carries with him. Or not even an ipod. Electronics and screens are not a daily use in the Toomey-Johnson casa. I just feel there are more interesting and child like things for an almost 10 year old to do! I love looking out my window and seeing 6 bicycles on the lawn and kids playing wiffle ball. I also like hearing Anthony say, “mom I am going to ride my bike to my friends house to see if they can play” DEAL!

One reason I am set on showing my children that you don’t have to buy or own the nicest of things. Is because I don’t want them to lose the meaning of what is actually important in life. It is the experiences you have and the family you have close. The time spent with them. I will forever prefer to take a vacation spent sleeping in a tent or cabin or couch surfing rather than a 5 star hotel. Even if I have the money, that is not the point.  I love that Anthony doesn’t know what a “brand name” is. I rather have a picnic on the ground then go out to eat at some fancy restaurant. My Oma says, most people live with a champagne taste on a beer budget! Which is true! they do so much to keep up with their friends or impress others and spend money that they don’t have. I do not want my kids growing up that way. I have traveled to many countries and most of it was traveling with the Marine Corps or with Optimum when I was sponsored. Thankfully, Nick is now in the Army and if we can we will always choose a place that will be able to not only progress nicks career but also give our children an experience of another way of life.

My mother was sick for most of my life, but she taught me so many life lessons. She showed me to love and value each day. To work hard for things you want. Not to expect others (not even your spouse) to change your situation, (I love my husband and I love life with him and want to be with him for the rest of my days, HOWEVER, I have invested enough in myself that I am fully capable of maintaining my life just as it is alone. I feel that is very important, especially for a woman. Not to rely on others solely for your wellbeing) My mother also taught me that life is too short to remain in a situation that you do not LOVE! If you are unhappy with a job, or your weight, or a hair do, CHANGE it! and don’t bitch about it to others unless you are willing to change. I have lived by her guidance. I have always trekked my own path. I have done things in life JUST BECAUSE others think I can’t. I am very proud of where I am in life and even more proud of the things to come. In a lot of ways my husband and I are a lifetime apart (he was still in high school when I already bought my first house and had a baby) 🙂 Now, seeing him come into his own and start to trek his own path is awesome. I love hearing him say he is going to go for “this” or he has started “that” at work.  So just as quick as I was to move to Missouri for a guy who spent his days working out, I will be willing to pick up our life every three years and explore the next place we end up at.

~Stephanie

 

Pregnant, AGAIN

This post is going to be a bunch of random stuff. I mostly post on here for my own time stamp and way to go back and read what I was thinking or doing at this point in my life. Currently I am 1 day shy of being half way through my pregnancy. Unlike being pregnant with Rowan Sage, this pregnancy is going by quickly! Probably because I am not reading every daily update about how my baby is growing from the size of an avocado and now the size of a tomato. I am having too much time enjoying watching baby Rowan change daily. Between her and Anthony keeping me busy and the lack of discomfort during this pregnancy the days are moving right by. I hear some women say how they LOVE being pregnant. ughhhh I don’t even wish I could say I want to be like you. I don’t particularly like it, at all. I feel very not like myself. I think I even wrote about it before. Just goes to show I meant it. But let me do the math really quickly…. I was actually pregnant before I got pregnant with Rowan. I had an IUD (periguard) in place since I delivered Anthony. So at the time it had been in for 8+ years. One day I just had a shooting pain through my bottom up to the front of my stomach. I knew something was wrong. I took a pregnancy test only because WEBMD recommended to check that off the list if you had an IUD in. When the test came back positive I was shocked. Not from lack of action 🙂 but that thing had been tried!! haha okay okay I went to the emergency room and my OBGYN came and removed my IUD at that time I was approximately 9 weeks pregnant. I went back in a few days later to make sure the HCG levels continued to elevate. They had more than doubled. The Dr was concerned that removing the IUD could disturb the pregnancy. I went in two days later again for another blood draw and the HCG levels had fallen. I was told I was having a miscarriage. I was given the option of having a DNC (I think that’s the acronym) or a pill to help with the miscarriage. I turned both options down and sad I would just have a natural miscarriage and let my body take care of it. In the middle of the night about a week later I started having the worst pain. Pain just like I felt when I was in active labor. The pain came in waves just like contractions. Nick called the nurse on call, she told him that was what happens during a natural miscarriage and it could go on for days or weeks. I had about 4 more episodes like that lasting over a period of 6 weeks. That is when the bleeding and cramping finally stopped. This all started in July of 2014 at the point was 9 weeks pregnant, the miscarriage lasted 6 weeks, so mid September I was back to having a normal period and my body settling from the hormonal roller coaster. JUST to get pregnant in January. Jan 2015-Oct 2015 I was prego with Rowan Sage, breast fed Oct-June 2015. Find out I am pregnant with baby girl number two since March (March-June pregnant and breastfeeding) June my milk unceremoniously dried up. Clogged milk ducts and all. Now its July I am 20 weeks pregnant. So from April 2014 my hormones/body hasn’t been itself. My skin is dry, my scalp is itchy, my face is splotchy, weight gain, hair loss, hair growth, and so many more unpleasant things that happen while pregnant. And some women love this! Perhaps they have pregnancies farther apart and look forward to them or plan for them. I am grateful and LOVE my babies. But I do not love being pregnant.

With all that being said, remember I said “this is for my own time stamp” as much as not loving my body when pregnant or the discomforts of being pregnant. I am thankful that God has given me the blessing and ability to grow and birth a child. My body is obviously very fertile and healthy. Blessed.

I don’t have any cravings  but one snack or meal I love and can eat anytime is Oats, with peanut butter, slivered almonds, and half a banana. I can eat this everyday.

my breakfast is almost the same everyday, which is 4 eggwhites one whole egg avocado and cheese on my eggs. Lunch I usually have a salad with whatever leftover protein I have cooked in the fridge. Dinner is whatever I make for the family, beer battered pork chops, baked chimichangas (however you spell that), steak and potatoes, pizza is a must one night a week.

So onto some other random things. I have some pet peeves that every time I witness them I think I need to write that down. So here they go.

I can’t stand when people walk in the OUT/Exit.  When people pull forward into an empty parking spot, (sometimes people are coming down the lane to pull in there), people who litter!!! even just a piece! I find it difficult to walk past trash that isn’t even mine. That could be from the years of “police calling” in the Marine Corps. I prefer cloth napkins and I do not like paper plates. (yes yes I know it causes more dishes and more laundry) I also do not like baby formula, I would never choose to give it to my baby, it smells, it makes nasty poop! oh here is a good one, my husband wakes up and pees with the seat down and the light off! what in da hell?? he is trying to sabotage me I know it. I need to potty train everyone in my house even the damn dogs!!! barefoot babies! I’m not talking beach or pool baby, I am talking chilly breeze or out at a restaurant. At least put socks on their feet. There are more, I knew I should write them down, now I can’t remember them. oh here is one, gossip, I cannot stand hearing about what so and so is doing and what so and so bought his wife, or what so and so wore to this or that place. Even the “news” is gossip to me. The reporters or journalist report their opinions not the facts which is gossip to me. I rather hear about what is going on in the person I am talking to life rather than talk about some third party person.

Anyway, I am the only person still awake in my house. Even the puppies are asleep. My husband is getting up in a few hours to go back to work for a jump. I am sure I will be up then too. So I better get some sleep while I can.

~Stephanie

 

My zoo visits the zoo

I really enjoy visiting museums, parks, gardens, zoos. When we first moved here I bought our family annual passes to the zoo. Anthony is quite the zookeeper himself. He knows so many facts on animals, their formal names, their abilities, how fast they hunt prey, and pretty much any unusual facts. I don’t even need to read the placard outside of the exhibits. I have my portable animal encyclopedia touring me through.  Yesterday, I told Nick I wanted to take the day to myself. But I honestly don’t enjoy doing things like shopping, or eating out, so what else was I going to do? I told him I rather go with him and the kids to the zoo.

It was a pretty warm day yesterday, it is not all igloos and snow here in Alaska. 🙂 It was warm out! And our house has two ceiling fans and no AC. It gets hotter inside (80 degrees) with bright sun shine 20 hours a day, than it does outside. So getting out of the house is a must.

Posting some photos from our trip to the zoo!!!

Also, some pregnancy updates. My cardio is waaaay down from being pretty sedentary over the last two years. Sedentary for me that is. Walking and hiking hasn’t kept me as in shape as I once was. I do not particularly enjoy being pregnant. I feel quite “out of body” I prefer being able to wrestle with my son. Or workout without limitations. Or pretty much do anything without limitations. It is not a welcomed thing for me to sit and rub my belly. Especially not to have others rub my stomach either. I haven’t had many cravings at all. A little heart burn later in the evenings if I eat anything like marinara  sauce, or something with onions. Thankfully hot sauce doesn’t seem to bother me, because I LOVE hot sauce on everything. Just a few things mostly so I can look back and remember, I think sometimes, some of us think back and remember a different version of the truth. My mother was great at writing memories down, and I am grateful for her doing so. Until next time.

~Stephanie

 

Our 4th of July

I am not entirely sure what I last posted but I am certain it was before the 4th of July. So to update what we did to celebrate our nations independence was hike of course. We venture up to Hatchers Pass. We climbs some gorgeous mountain sides where the temperatures drastically changes with the elevation. We even came across some snow. Anthony was very excited to see the patches of snow, just wait little son, there will be more snow than you know what to do with in just a short few months. We did one pretty steep climb as a family. Nick carried Rowan Sage in our kealty pack and Anthony was a mad man attacking these slick mountain cliffs. The mountains here are so gorgeous, running water, rain forest marsh, snow patches, rocks, so many different elements just in one view. After our first climb we continued to drive further into Hatchers Pass and went off a less travels road. There were several mining shacks nestled in the sides of the mountains and at the tops of some. Still having the cables running up to them where they would send stuff up and down. We parked and Nick decided to bound his way up a very steep and tall mountain. I took the kids and hiked a not so steep hill to an older abandoned mining site. We watched, carefully, trying to track dad as he climbed. He soon became a dot among many on the side of the mountain. I would just stop and wave every 100 meters or so, just in case he was looking for our proud waves as he was climbing. It took us both about the same amount of time to get where we were going. And as I trekked back with the kiddos little Rowan Sage fell asleep in her pack. Must have been a smooth ride. 🙂 I will post pictures at the closure of this post. After we all met up again. Nick went over some routine first aid with Anthony and I fed and changed the baby. Then we were on the move. To “Independence Mine” a old mining town from the 1930’s it was another climb to walk through the “town” but what a very cool little history lesson. We made the scenic drive into Wasilla and stopped at the family restaurant for some dinner. To our surprise they had the “fireworks” show right behind the restaurant. Anthony loved it, even though the sun was shinning as bright as it does as 3 pm. LOL he thought it was really neat to “see” fireworks in Alaska. I on the other hand, couldn’t “see” much. And Rowan Sage was not happy about the loud finale. That pretty much ended our 4th of July. It was full of beer, or booze, not even fireworks. Just a wonderful spent day with our little family no other way I would have wanted it to be.

~Stephanie

Its Been a While

I am finally sitting in a very quite house while the baby is down for a nap, Nick is taking a nap recovering from duty last night, and Anthony took his guitars down the street to start a rock band. (thankfully they didn’t decide to rock band in our garage) I really love the little ideas, some better than others, that Anthony and his buddies come up with. They build, they take things apart, they jump ramps, ride bikes, drink from the hoses, and come home pretty filthy daily. Childhood success!!! I haven’t written on this blog in a very long time. I think it has been a couple months. We arrived here in Alaska in April and now it is the first of July. Time flies and a lot has happened. In a nutshell, our family has grown with another puppy, Jasper, she is a mutt, but mostly lab and husky. She is full of energy. Shortly after getting Jasper I knew I was not feeling quite “myself”. Not really knowing what “myself” means these days. I feel I have been sleep deprived and worn out for the past year. But one afternoon Nick came home and I took a solo trip to Walgreens. I grabbed a pregnancy test, sour worms, and orange juice. I snapped a quick picture to my best friend Marlena and her reply was instant and direct. “SHUT UP!” haha She is my first/go-to person with any news (the good the bad the ugly) I told her I would keep her posted. I went home and instantly that pee sucking stick read “pregnant”. I called Marlena on FaceTime because her reaction was definitely going to be better and more animated than Nicks. I showed her the stick and you would have thought it was OUR baby. lol. She was excited and I could still sense she was trying to keep me calm from not panicking over having a 6 month old baby and finding out you’re pregnant. I came downstairs, with Marley in hand, literally. Nick was sitting in the garage having a beer. I think he was preparing. I tossed him the stick. As expected, from his previous reaction. He says “what does this mean?” I responded with, “we JUST did this, don’t you know what that means by now?” He smirked and said “we will have to see”. I turned to Marley who was laughing on the hook. Basically, Nick likes to wait until he can see the ultrasound. I had weeks until we went in for the first ultrasound and those very early weeks of pregnancy I was definitely aware I had a new baby developing, sick! Fast forward now, I am 17 weeks along and we’ve seen baby a few times. It is now confirmed a SHE, and that we are so very excited about!!! Anthony was really hoping for a little brother, but as I explained to him, by the time this baby is old enough to “play” he will be so old he won’t be interested in playing with the little person. But being a big brother to two little sisters is a very special job. He loves having a title. Big brother has been the best one yet. The very special relationship Anthony and I have had over the years, I was really hoping he would remain my only boy (for now at least 😉

The summer is in full swing here in Alaska, our temperature linger around the low 70’s. We get rain, not much thunder or lightning. But most days are absolutely beautiful. We like to take the trucks (my “new” sweet ’93 Toyota Land Cruiser, and Nicks ’90 Ford F-150) to some off-roading spots. Let the dogs get filthy and explore this grand state of Alaska. I would love to stay here but in a few years we will be claiming another state or country as home. This summer I will be graduating with my bachelors in Business, and I am applying for the MBA program for next year. I have to continue to better myself, so once the baby making factory is shut down I am someone worth hiring. I enjoy being home with Anthony and Rowan. To be honest, if Anthony went to physical school last year and not homeschooling being a “stay at home mom” would have been a breeze!! I don’t know what I would have done with all the spare time. Next year he will be starting public school again. And I have been interviewing nannies. If the right job comes along I will be going back to work before baby number 3 is school age. My plan, which was timed just perfectly, was to be finishing my degree this summer. So Anthony could go back to school in the fall and Rowan would be going on 1 years old and no longer breast feeding. Well that plan went to shit when I got pregnant again. Now, having a one year old and expecting a new baby early December, I might just work on my Masters degree and then go to work the following fall. We will see how the chips fall after this baby comes along. I have felt really good other than extremely exhausted, so far. I have already started some itching in my hands and feet. (I have a condition when I am pregnant called Cholestasis, its when the bile stops flowing or slows and spills from the liver into the bloodstream) it causes and extreme itch from the inside out. NOTHING stops the itch, except a pill. But if you have the condition you are likely to get it in 80% of your other pregnancies. I had it with both Anthony and Rowan, and already have felt it starting with this one. Yipee for me and the incredible itch. haha.

Well, that’s enough for now. Even though there is much more I could talk about and update. I am going to attach a few photos from Alaska life and the kids.

~Stephanie